January was a mix of things for me. Anxiety about a class I needed to repeat (and passed!), frustration with people misgendering me, concerned about subconscious racism I witnessed, my 100 days of violin, and starting off the new year. Life in motion, always growing.
I’m welcoming a month focused on Love with a capital L, and putting love into my actions. I fell off the violin bandwagon, and I’m getting back on. I am terrible at correcting people when they call me the wrong pronouns. Inside my head, I want to scream or cry. I feel unseen for who I want to be in the world. Who I think I am presenting. I can’t say it with love, so I don’t say it at all. I’m not loving myself though by being silent. Which brings me to racial microaggressions.
I found some links that explain racial microaggressions better than I can. I’m still learning, and am able to see some of these, but it’s a daily practice for me. I mess up by trying NOT to mess up. It can be complex, but is extremely important work to do. The impact can be significant.
Dear anti-racist allies: Here’s how to respond to microaggressions
Unmasking ‘racial micro aggressions’
Racial Microaggressions in Everyday Life, Implications for Clinical Practice
I have also been reading adrienne maree brown’s book, “Pleasure Activism” which explores Black Joy and why pleasure is political.
Learning how to love my human siblings teaches me how to love myself, and vice versa.
May each of you find deep abiding love for yourself this month, which extends to the universe we live in.
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